365 Days

Over the last year life has taken some major turns for me and I have not

really felt much like blogging. I am now thinking that I am ready to start sharing with those few of you who read my blog again.

This week is marking an end to the first year with out my Daddy, the beginning of a new manager's position for Michael and the beginning of the finial year of high school for Stephenie. So as those of you who know me know the water works have been working over time. As I look back over the last year of first with out Dad and Daddy T it brings mixed emotions both happy and sad. Not only the for mentioned beginnings I am also watching Katalina start her high school days, Joesph starting his second year in middle school, Sophia moving into 3rd grade and waiting on the arrival of a new niece along with her proud parents Bryan and Bethany.

My art has taken a backseat this past year as the mojo just had not been there. I must apologize to those of you that look forward to cards and such but I just couldn't do it. SORRY! Hoping to get back on track soon. I have done several projects for me (this collage piece about is one) and have a couple more in the planning process too. I will post pictures once I get them all done.

The house has taken priority this past year. While Daddy was in the hospital he and I had many discussions about what and how I needed to do many of them. Some of them have been hard to start and complete as they were to be our projects and he was not there with me in body, he sure was in spirit. I talked many things over with him while doing them. Once again now that I am feeling like sharing again I will be posting pictures.

My heart is heavy with sorrow, full of joy and hope for the future as I write this. I am glad to know that I now have two Angels watching over me. Knowing that God has carried me through the last year it the biggest comfort of all.

A Time to Say GOODBYE

Prelude: This a very special post. I am hoping that maybe on it's way through the internet my Dad will see it.

On Friday August 7th at 12:15 pm the first man of my life, My Dad went to heaven while all of those who LOVED him were at his bedside when he drew his last breath. I am so greatful for Dr Michael Smith who let him die with diginity and the way he wanted. He didn't play on our sympthies to keep doing things that was not going to really fix the problem. To the nurses of CVICU at Bapist Hospital who for the most of the last 30 days of his life took great care of him and made him as comfortable as possible. Especially Nichole the nusre who was on duty for his finial hours. I pray that she will find comfort too as this was her first time losing a patient. She did it with such grace and she shedded a few tears( which to me meant that she had compassion for her patients). While waiting that morning the housekeeper who had been cleaning his room came by and gave me a big hug and told me she really liked Mr Murphy. God places people where they need to be.

Durning the last few sleepless nights I have many thought and memories flooding back. Since I was to be a Michael but was a Michelle I got to share his middle name Ray.(now I was not real found of it as a young child now it means the world to me.) The fishing trips,(he was with me when I won the fising rodeo) camping trips, him being one of my scout leaders, playing jacks and cards,(he played to win and I played to talk) even the time that I sat on the front porach all afternoon waiting on him to spank me because I did what he told me not to. The Christmas that money was tight and he built my sister and I a kitchen set that our kids have gotten to play with. The pride he had when all the grandbaies were born. All the times he let me peddle along his side. Since he did let me do this I now have the ability to do fix things, create things and dream up projects to conquer and no fear too. I will miss having him to call to discuss on how to do things and this could take us hours to get them worked out. I really enjoyed my Dad days when he came over and spent the day just peddling(oh I mean fixing things). Him calling around Thanksgiving and having me pick up Mom's gifts for Christmas. The few gifts that he bought me himself. The Valentines cards that he sent just because I was his little girl even still in my 40's. Well I could go on for hours and those close to me over the next few weeks might just have to tell me that it enough Dad stories. I am not saying that all of the memories of the last 43 years were great but they are MY memories of the MOST SPECIAL MAN IN my life my DADDY!!

So Daddy I know that you are in a better place and with your family that has gone on before you. I know that you are not laying in that most uncomfortable bed that you had to endure for the last 29 days and all the poking of needles. I am so glad that you can breath with out a struggle and your heart is beating in a regular beat again. As we prepare to say good bye to your earthly body on Wednesday with all your family and friends. Which I am sure will be many as you were so loved by many. Hey Uncle Jack is even coming. I want you to know that if you are watching you will see tears they will be sad tears for those left behind and joyous tears for you because are in a better place and waiting on us. I truly hope that while watch over me in years I have left on earth I still make you proud of your Hot Rod! I know that I have given some grief over the years but I hope that I gave you some proud moments too. As you can by the picture above you are were loved by us all and you will be in your hearts FOREVER! So Daddy now that you are at rest and with your Heavenly Father all I can say is: I LOVE YOU WITH ALL MY HEART AND I WILL NEVER FORGET YOU!!!

Love,
Michelle Raye Murphy(btw thanks for letting me have it back LOL)